they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
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