He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
