I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
