I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
