Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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