You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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