Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
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