i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
