I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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