Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
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Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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