So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
