hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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