The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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