By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
