I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
