So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
