he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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