Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
