I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Randomize
