You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
