the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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