You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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