I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize