No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
