After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
