Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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