I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
pray to the hookup gods
How does it feel to date your dad?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
