you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize