I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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