Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
the day after is always just damage control
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
