dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
