ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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