Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
