She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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