I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
