it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
He shit in the fireplace
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize