You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
