I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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