remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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