it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
