These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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