Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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