Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize