from now on my penis is your penis
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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