Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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