How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize