How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
