but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
