Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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