i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
