i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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